The self-help genre is flooded with books, especially since the advent of A.I. So it can be hard to determine what to read first. Everyone seems to have good reviews, but sometimes the message in these books is not quite fitting for everyone. The more you read, the more you start to realize not a lot of self-help books are catered specifically to men. Being a self-help junkie for over 20 years now, I’ve read every self-help book imaginable, and in this list, I’m compiling a top 10 list every man should read.
Here’s my filter. I don’t care how many copies a book sold. I care whether it changed how I operate. Not how I felt for a weekend — how I actually live. These are written by men who did the work first and wrote about it second. These are the best motivational books for men I’ve found in over 20 years of searching, and I’d stack this list against anyone’s.
The 33 Lies of Success by Shah Day
The 33 Lies of Success cover
“The 33 Lies of Success” is fairly new to the market, but it is one that is a must-read for every man because it is grounded in realism. This book is broken up into two parts, with mini chapters that are easy to get through with daily short reads. Part I tears down 33 lies of success that you’ve been told in every self-help book out there, and shows you how to rewire yourself out of these lies. It touches on myths like the “law of attraction” and, at the same time, can help you understand that “hard work” isn’t the end-all-be-all. Part II is the truth about success — how it actually works. It dives into real examples of how to succeed in life, touching on things like discipline, rest, health, and actionable tips to focus on the right things. It’s marketed as a “help self” book, rather than a “self-help” book.
The biggest takeaway in this book is that most of what you hear out there is fluff that has no substance in guiding you to actual success principles. When the lies come down first, the truth actually has room to land — most books get that backwards. The author himself is a successful entrepreneur and coach who says he has gone through the self-help lies “the hard way.”
Be Useful by Arnold Schwarzenegger
If you don’t know Arnold, you may find a picture of him next to the word “success” in the dictionary.
He is a guy that went from being an Austrian immigrant, to the best bodybuilder of all time, to the highest-earning actor of his time, to the governor of California, to a best-selling author and philanthropist. Not to mention, a wildly successful businessman before he ever even got the fame from bodybuilding.
Everything that Arnold has ever set his mind on doing, he has done, and he has done it from the most humble of beginnings. He’s as close to a “self-made” man as there is.
In this book, he very simply outlines his rules for success in 7 easy-to-understand tips to help men realize their potential and how they can too “Be Useful.”
The title comes from the advice his father drilled into him, and the whole book shows you what that looks like in practice. Every rule comes straight out of his own life — having a clear vision, refusing to think small, working like crazy, and selling yourself without shame. This isn’t a book about feeling motivated. It’s a book about becoming the kind of man other people can count on.
Never Finished by David Goggins
If you’re a man, then you’ve likely heard of “The Hardest Man on the Planet,” David Goggins. His book “Never Finished” is somewhat of a sequel to his first book, Can’t Hurt Me. The reason this book is on the list and not his first book is because I actually found it even more motivating than the first. You realize that his accomplishments are not all the glamor, accolades, and motivational speeches we see on social media. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. There are a lot of dark days, and there is not one ounce of smooth sailing in his process. He continually overcomes both the mental and physical struggles in a way that is extremely inspiring to read about. I guarantee you will get up and get moving after you finish this book.
Most men hit one big goal and coast on it forever. Goggins treats every finish line like a starting line. You don’t read this book to become David Goggins. You read it to stop negotiating with yourself every time things get uncomfortable.
Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel
It doesn’t matter what you do in life; if you don’t know how to manage your money, you won’t go far. Oftentimes, money management is the one discipline that most men lack, and yet it can be the most important discipline to have. I personally have mastered discipline in my day, but the lack of financial discipline has caused me much pain throughout my success journey. No matter how much money I made, I somehow always lived paycheck to paycheck.
This book helped rewire my mind. It doesn’t just do that for money either; it shows you a different way of thinking rationally about life and your money.
Housel’s big point is that doing well with money has little to do with how smart you are and everything to do with how you behave. That’s why you see brilliant men go broke and average guys quietly build wealth. It’s not a math problem. It’s a behavior problem.
Mastery by Robert Greene
Robert Greene is the famous author of The 48 Laws of Power, and Mastery is his take on what it takes to become the best at something. If you know anything about Robert Greene, his advice is always grounded in reality. This is a thick book, but one that every man should read to remind himself that “every master was once a disaster.”
Greene walks through the lives of masters in every field, and the pattern is the same every time: a long apprenticeship, years of practice nobody claps for, then skill that looks like magic to everyone who didn’t watch the process. That’s the part most men don’t want to hear. We want the shortcut. Greene shows you there isn’t one, and that’s the point: mastery isn’t reserved for the gifted. It’s reserved for the patient.
Talent Is Overrated by Geoff Colvin
One of my all-time favorite books because it helps you understand the one very important concept of “deliberate practice.” Years ago, there was a very popular phenomenon called the “10,000-hour rule” that said to become a world-class expert, you need to spend 10,000 hours doing something. However, in this book, Geoff Colvin outlines something that this rule misses, which is that it’s not just 10,000 hours of doing something that makes you an expert; it’s that amount of time actually practicing it.
I can throw thousands of punches and get a good workout, but I won’t get any better at it if I’m not actively practicing how to throw a better punch.
And thus, it’s not just 10,000 hours of doing; it’s 10,000 hours of doing it right.
Deliberate practice is uncomfortable by design. You work on the thing you’re worst at, get honest feedback, and do it again. Most people never practice that way, which is exactly why most people stay average.
The best part is that this is only one of the gems that you will take away from this amazing book.
The 50th Law by 50 Cent and Robert Greene
This is a book that Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson and Robert Greene teamed up on to create The 50th Law. This book is a deep dive into fear, how to manage it, and how to emerge fearless on the other side of it. It’s a simple yet deep psychological dive into how to control and use fear to our advantage, and most importantly, how to overcome it. It is one of the best success books you will read, and it will change who you are as a man once you’re done reading it.
Much like Arnold, 50 Cent is a guy that came from an insane life as a prominent drug dealer to leaving the dangerous life behind after getting shot 9 times, becoming a successful musician, successful actor, wildly successful business mogul, and now an entertainment entrepreneur, having produced countless successful TV shows.
He knows a thing or two about navigating this life thing with no fear.
The War of Art by Steven Pressfield
The War of Art is a book that is mostly for creatives, but this book is valuable for anyone on any journey in life because it introduces you to the concept of “The Resistance.” This mythical force tries to sabotage you as soon as you try to make a positive change in your life. Bringing this force into awareness can help you battle it.
Pressfield shows that Resistance dresses itself up as procrastination, self-doubt, distraction, and every “good reason” for putting something off. Once you have a name for it, you start seeing it everywhere. That voice that says start Monday? Resistance. His answer is what he calls turning pro — showing up and doing the work every day whether you feel like it or not. You can finish this book in a weekend. You’ll think about it for years.
Outwitting the Devil by Napoleon Hill
This book is a bit different from the other books on this list because it is a little less grounded, yet one of the most impactful books you will read. It’s a super easy read, but it will change your life. This book is a literal Q&A session with the devil that allows you to see how he operates and how he traps your mind and soul to belong to him. This is written by the same guy who wrote Think and Grow Rich, but this book, in my opinion, is twice as impactful.
The concept that hit me hardest is what Hill calls “drifting.” A drifter is a man who lets life happen to him — no definite purpose, no plan, just reacting to whatever comes. The devil claims the drifters are the easiest men to own. If you’ve been coasting, this book will call you out in a way no modern author has the guts to.
Great by Choice by Jim Collins and Morten Hansen
Great by Choice is a business book, but it has so many incredible self-help elements in it. It touches on the concept of consistency through the “20 Mile March” story and dives into a little something called “super discipline” that will open your eyes to a world of being on point about all of your efforts, and not just taking half measures in your daily life.
The 20 Mile March comes from the story of two teams racing to the South Pole. One marched a steady twenty miles every day, in good weather and bad. The other sprinted on good days and sat in their tents on bad ones. The steady team won, and the other team didn’t make it back. Collins and Hansen apply that principle to companies, but I apply it to everything — training, business, family. Consistency beats intensity. Every single time.
No More Living Passively
These self-help books are a must-read for every man because they have the necessary source material to wire you for success and help you in this very competitive modern environment for men. These books will give you the edge to be the best man that you could be.
But here’s my challenge: don’t just read them. Pick the one that hit a nerve and order it today. Read a chapter a day. Then actually do something with what you read, because a book you don’t apply is just entertainment. The men who get ahead aren’t the ones who know the most. They’re the ones who act on what they know. Stop scrolling, start reading, and get to work.
